Today I got to thinking. Damn. I'm a junior in college, and all I've ever really done with my life, and I mean EVER really done, is go to school. From the time I was probably 4 or 5 years old, I've been in some form of school. Preschool. Then elementary, middle and high school. Now I'm in college. And looking forward a year, I'm almost done. And I have no idea what I'm going to do afterwards.
It's terrifying, to say the least. How are we supposed to know what to do after 16 years of education? You can be told what it's like, but I'd be willing to bet that it's nothing like how any of us expect it to be. That's always how it seems to turn out. In the 6th grade, we were told that middle school was going to 'kick it up a notch', then that high school was even harder. That the teachers wouldn't be there to hold our hands. And yet, I found that it was quite not the case. Teachers continued to care about our education. They wanted us to do well. I can think of a few that truly wanted to teach, and to have all their students excel. My physics teacher was one of the most inspirational teachers I've had. So was my American History teacher from high school. They were both so involved in getting their students to think, but I digress. When we graduate from high school, everyone tells us that college is going to be ten times harder than high school was. But in reality, it isn't. It's just different. Some of the professors couldn't care less whether or not you do the homework, or pass the tests or even if you come to class. But some of them do. Some care greatly about their students' successes. There's more time in a college student's life. And I know that I for one can't always handle that. I get bored and restless. I sometimes even miss high school. Ha, what a notion.
College is what you want it to be. You choose your classes, you choose the amount of effort you put in to your education and you choose whether or not you see it through to the end. Then when it's over, what do you do? I don't know yet. And it's scary not knowing where I'll be going in a year. But I'm hoping that wherever I go, I'll be happy in it and hopefully it will have something to do with my major. Otherwise, it would seem that I've wasted 4 years of my life, won't it?
I guess that's all for today.Or tonight rather. Maybe tomorrow will hold more answers.
-A
